If your partner showers you with so much attention that it’s hard to breathe, it’s a reason for concern. Love bombing is innocent-looking abuse, which gets your head in the clouds. Once you’re trapped, get ready for a harsh battle between your mind and soul.
Bright Side is pouring a bucket of ice-cold water on your fast-paced, passionate relationship in order to rescue you.
Love bombing in a nutshell
Love bombing is a way of influencing a person using affection and kindness. It probably sounds like something frivolous or maybe even funny. However, the consequences of this phenomenon can not only be saddening but tragic as well. The goal of love bombing is to get you hooked.
Your independence and self-respect weaken so much, your partner can play you like a puppet. It’s hard to distinguish between a healthy love interest and an evil strategy. To understand who you’re dealing with better, be sure to look out for some warning signs.
How to tell if you’re being love bombed
1. You’re showered with attention.
Love bombers will try to make you feel special by all means. No matter how much you talk, they will never get tired of you. You get love stickers 24/7, receive creative compliments, and are gifted expensive things. Eventually, they sweep you off your feet.
The point here is to catch you in the trap to the point where you can’t imagine your life without the bomber.
2. You’re isolated from other relationships.
Love bombers believe that other people should never stand in the way of your “love.” They must have all of your attention all the time. It’s even possible to convince the victim of being “the only important person in their whole life.” Luckily, it’s easy to check if you’re being love bombed: try to withdraw from the abuser for a while.
As a rule, a love bomber gets really angry if you don’t give them the attention they want.
3. Your partner runs hot and cold.
Love bombers are just narcissists. They always need some kind of prize, a sign of victory or power over you. The best way for them to check how interested you are is to run both hot and cold. For example, if you are still waiting for a reconciliation and a second chance after a breakup, they win a point.
This emotional roller-coaster is like a game reset. They will wrap you around their finger again and again and get the prize of satisfaction when they win.
4. Your partner is instantly infatuated.
It might take weeks or even days for a love bomber to proclaim great love. Saying things like “I love you” when you’ve just met is unreasonable, although, there might be some exceptions. However, all those hackneyed phrases, like “You’re my soulmate,” or “You’re the one I’ve always been looking for,” are simple manipulations. The abuser is trying to convince you that the stars aligned and you’ve finally found your one and only.
If you’re being love bombed, the words you’re so pleased to hear are just an act of creativity.
Hidden dangers of love bombing
1. You might develop an unhealthy dependency.
The main goal of love bombing is to make you emotionally and mentally dependent on the abuser. Over time, you get used to all the kindness, attention, and support, and when you’re all alone with your thoughts, you feel empty and lonesome. As a result, you end up coming back to your love bomber because they’re your source of warmth and love.
2. You become manipulated by a narcissist.
Love bombers use various types of manipulation. Flattery and proclamations of love are just the tip of the iceberg. After some time, the abuser starts to manipulate you. For example, they might deliberately make you feel guilty, even if you did nothing wrong.
In the end, you are not love bombed but mercilessly gaslit.
3. Your weaknesses and insecurities are exploited.
They will make you feel confused or guilty when you least expect it. In fact, love bombing can affect you in a multitude of ways. The exploitation of your weaknesses tightens the abuser’s grip and lets them control you better. Love bombing is not love — it’s abuse in its entirety.
4. You are forced to maintain the relationship.
Love bombers always rush things because they don’t want to experience all the ups and downs of a long-term relationship. You might feel like it’s too much and you both need a break. However, it won’t be that easy to get out of it. “It’s been 5 minutes, why won’t you reply? Are you ignoring me?” This is what you have to be ready for.
If something doesn’t go according to the abuser’s plan, drama is on its way!
Have you ever been love bombed? Do you think love at first sight is possible?